I was halfway through the Lerner catalog when they leapt out at me from the page – PINK COWBOY BOOTS. Ever since I was a little girl I have wanted a pair of pink cowboy boots. I still remember showing a high heeled pair to my mother four different times during various shopping trips to theValley Plaza in the hopes they should show up under the Christmas tree. My mother, sadly, was of the opinion that 14-year-old girls didn’t NEED high-heeled cowboy boots in any color. Every once in awhile I’d catch sight of pink cowboy boots in a store display but store was always StrideRite and they were always for little girls. It seemed so unjust.
And now, all these years later, there they were, PINK BOOTS in MY SIZE and they were only $49.99! What a bargain! I was so excited. I carefully folded the page back and laid it on my nightstand to show John when he got home from work.
I forgot all about them until we were getting into bed and the sight of the catalog jogged my memory. “Look!” I said, shoving the catalog towards him, “pink cowboy boots and they’re only $50! And you said you were going to buy me a present because I have been so good lately!" He look from me to the boots and back at me again, a pained expression on his face. He was silent for a moment and then said, “Why don’t we wait a few days before ordering them just to make SURE this isn’t a PMS purchase, okay?” I happily agreed knowing that come Monday or Tuesday I would still want them. I had waited my whole life… I could wait a few more days.
Sunday, on the way back from running errands, John suggested we stop at the Playmobil store. We’d been checking in every few weeks to see if the new figures were in. A quick check of the shelves confirmed they finally were in. We happily marched up to the counter with a bag full of rocks, the Spirit, the Royal Guard and Robin Hood. As we were leaving John gleefully said, “See, now I got you a treat so I don’t have to buy you those pink boots… of course if you want to make them your yearly boot purchase that’s up to you.” I glared at him and shook my head. I wanted those boots, but I only get one major boot purchase a year and usually they cost a lot more than $50. “Thbbt,” I thought, “I’ll just use my frivolous money to buy them for myself!” and then went back to being all excited about my new Playmobil figures.
Skip ahead to New Orleans. Evelyn and I spent a good portion of our time shopping (shocking I know). As we were passing this trendy bondage-y kinda store I spotted a bunch of boots and we wandered in (feeling and looking like tourists from Iowa in our shorts and tennies) I was admiring a lovely pair of cow patterned boots when Evelyn squealed and called me over. In her hand she was holding a pink, glittery, high-heeled platform boot! It was glorious and it was only $30! I grabbed the boot from her and thought with glee what great revenge buying them would be. If pink cowboy boots made John wince, pink glitter bondage boots would probably kill him. Or make him whimper at the very least. We decided to shop a bit more and come back later.
A couple hours and many blocks, stores and purchases later we came across a very trendy clothing store that also had boots in the window. I dragged Evelyn in and there found my true boot purchase for the year – kicky Crimson Patent Leather Boots. I knew these were the boots for me and I knew that although John probably wouldn’t love them they at least wouldn’t make him cry. And I’d probably get more use out of them because, honestly, how many places can you wear pink glitter bondage boots?
So now I am home with my new crimson boots lovingly tucked into my boot box but I haven’t yet been able to throw away the Lerner catalog. It has been sitting on my nightstand all this time, pink cowboy boots calling to me as I walk past. As for my plan of spending my frivolous money on them? I came back from New Orleans with -$4.00 and it is gonna be awhile until I get paid again. My compromise? To write the whole story out for you and then send you the page from the catalog so that you may enjoy them and I won’t accidentally spend money I don’t have.
